That's what friends are for...

In all honesty, I never saw it that way before but I am glad you guys came up to me... I'll put in some serious effort the next time I wear those running shoes.

Last Entry of the Year

And just like that, it comes to an end. The coming of 2010 in approximately 10 hours time will not only mark the end of 2009, a terrible year, academically, for me nonetheless, but also come to symbolize the passing of a decade. Its hard to believe that just 10 years ago, without Sumo or this lappy to keep me company, I was getting all excited as I marked the end of a good 1999. Excellent PSLE grades, entry into RI... the sky seemed like the limit then and I was invincible. As the years went by, I got lazy and stopped working hard to bring myself to new limits and reality... through gravity... sent me crashing back down to earth. So here I stand, somewhat battered and bruised, my ego shattered upon the dusty floor, looking skywards where my mates are now soaring high above enjoying the fruits of their labour. Stung with envy and ravaged by self pity, I have cried, screamed in rage and in the terminology of the 21st century, emo-ed about the state I was and am in countless times. However, I have also learnt from my mistakes and realized what I must do next to get back up in the sky where I know I belong. The next ten years are going to come and go twice as fast, as what others who have made that journey all say, and I don't intend on taking a backseat this time around. So with that I say farewell to 2009 and hello to a new start in 2010:)

Its harder than it looks

I must add that it has been a rather satisfying first week :)

Reality Checked: Part 2

Its official. My application to France for a semester has been rejected. The bad news just doesn't stop coming so it seems. So where does this latest piece of news leave me? Well, I have always championed the fact that if you've got the guts to talk the talk, make sure when the time comes to walk the talk... you're willing to take that first step and more. I haven't been focused as of late and I guess my results took a beating as a result of the rather enjoyable time I have had as of late. My nonchalant attitude towards my academic pursuits have finally caught up with me and here I am left all alone in this boring island I call home whilst my peers go off to greener pastures to experience life as it is across borders. So here I am, bearing the consequences of my frivolous lifestyle, bitter and terribly upset at having been denied the opportunity of traveling overseas. Well I must reconcile with the fact that I have had a rather easy life thus far with me getting almost anything I want rather easily... and this without a doubt has quenched that hunger for more and left me too contented and way too complacent with myself and my capabilities. Now that I have re conciliated with harsh reality of my rather sorry state... what next?

Well, it seems that ever since my Clearwater race/trip, its been one reality check after the other for me, all of them harsh reality checks indeed. The truth hurts and I'll probably be thankful for feeling the pinch in time to come but right now... I am just bitter and pissed. I realized too that being nice and popular counts for shit when push comes to shove and ultimately... its the results that matter the most. So as of now, it is with great sadness that I announce that the Singapore education system has now claimed its latest victim... Me. I just buried the old me in the abandoned field beside my grass-run-route. No fanfare, no tears... just a blank face staring emotionlessly into silence and stillness of the night. Its been fun while it lasted I must say... and Thank you... Thank you very much for the memories.

Choices

Photo Courtesy of Whelan :)

Two contrasting experiences in two days.

Champagne, Loud Music, Cologne and Flashing Disco Lights all night long marked the first

100 Plus, Deafening Cheers, Sweat and Flashing Camera Lights all through the morning marked the second.

I am so glad it wasn't much of a choice :)

To those that ran the Standard Charted Marathon today, Congrats on a Marathon/Half-Marathon well-done :) Mok, Ashley and Mr Liu... the three of you (plus any others I might have missed out...) are without doubt a force to be reckon with and my hope is that I be strong enough to sustain that discipline and self restraint in time to come :)

Mark Zukerberg

After the morning Bak Chor Mee and Kopi-O with Daddy, We both headed home to finish up with the laundry. Whilst I was folding the clothes, I switched on the TV to the sound of Oprah and Gale laughing with this geek sitting in between them. The geek with the title of being the world's youngest billionaire and CEO of the one site that has millions around the world hooked on it. The geek that got me thinking about the bigger picture in life. The geek that made stellar GPA's and sporting excellence look bad... :) Now to find that million dollar idea of mine :)

je ne parle francais

je peux apprende francais... mais je tres fatigue... je ne dormir pas...

I decided... that I will blog one paragraph in French everyday...

Writing Styles

I seriously need to work on the way I write. Before I do that, I am going to quote a song. A really fluffy, pop-ish song... that I think pretty much sums up my aspirations. Call me superficial or whatever you think suits me but sentiments are sentiments and this is what I am feeling right this very instant, as I attempt to draw the discipline I need to start some serious work...

When I grow up

I wanna be famous

I wanna be a star

I wanna be in movies

When I grow up

I wanna see the world

Drive nice cars

I wanna have groupies

BUT I think a twist in the lyrics would be a more accurate description what I really want...

When I'm 25

I wanna be famous

Be a sensation

Appear in Documentaries

When I'm 27

I wanna rule the world

Fly nice planes

I wanna own countries

.... LOL

Time to "snap back to reality..." and get some SS1201 outta the way :(

Game On.

The problem with some institutions is that they think they can get away with anything. That's a rather significant issue that I'd like to rectify in time to come. 

What I am going to do today.

I am taking a cue from Qiu Rong here... If I publicly announce what I intend on achieving by the end of tonight... I will get it done... So here goes nothing. 

I, Jason Yip, am going to:

1. Book a Thursday grooming session for Sumo
2. Confirm and finalize the Europe Tour
3. Workout... it can be a bike ride, a swim... anything...
4. Finish reading that article on Franchising... so I know what the heck to talk about this Fri
5. Reach Suntec in time for dinner
6. (Attempt...) Put the house back in hospitable conditions
7. (Attempt to...) Figure out why the cappuccino taste so darn weird this morning
8. Take all three doses of medicine on time... (Morning dosage down!)
   

There... everything out haha... Let's see how the day goes now :)

Just an update... I managed to get a booking for Sumo, Confirmed the itinerary but not finalize anything yet for the tour (Thanks fellow Travel Buddies!!), did not manage a workout, did not read the darn article at all. I however did reach Suntec in time, did clean up the house a bit and took my medicine on time... The coffee still taste like crap though... on hindsight.... crap... hmmm... 

I should just give up on the business plans I had and be a damn travel planner. 

Change of Heart

Sometimes, the path needs to be walked alone. No more waiting. No more grand training plans. Period.

Anyway, I have my stuff scheduled already. All all that's left is to make them happen :)

Determination

I am going to finish Econometrics by tonight. Period. And before the night is over... I would have ran a couple of kilometers... and finished reading one of the most insightful blogs I have read in a long long time (excluding those that are already on the blog roll to the bottom left of this page...) 

Reflections at Fong Seng

Today's entry was not written by me. Well not entirely anyway.  After a terribly late supper last night at "the land of oil, lard and simple carbs", Nicolas decided to pen down his reflections on the rather meaningful conversation we had about school, life and basically about the choices we make today and its impact on us tomorrow. Prior to this supper session, I had the great fortune of dining with some of the people that I can only dream of being in time to come. With that, I have come to realize that life isn't about hitting the top of the bell curve in school in every single assessment nor is it about accumulating massive amounts of wealth before kicking the bucket. Perhaps its all about being who you really are and being the best you can ever be. Its about making your own road and leading your life to your fullest not for anyone but yourself.  Words don't do justice to the sentiments we felt as we sipped our "tea-ping" along Pasir Panjang Road at 2.30 am in the morning but Nicolas certainly did a mighty fine job in capturing the essence of it all. 

Hello!

I am a person who likes to reflect on things. And after our supper, this was the result of my reflection. Its just to share. so... yup! See ya all in the morning!

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It is 2:45am now. I just came back from a nice drink with Jason and Jia Jie. It was the best cup of Teh Tarik I have ever had. We talked about many things. It began with triathlon and the aquathlon team. Then we shared stories of our past sporting experience. Eventually we came down to school life. Without joining the biathlon, my school life would be meaningless. I am interested in food science, and I take modules that I am truly interested in. But I hate the mentality that everyone has, that we must get an A. Everyone is gunning for that A. Everyone is mugging and doing everything they can for it. I would like an A. It would be a reflection of the effort I put in. It would be nice. But even if I put in effort, there is always a chance that something might happen and I do not get that result. Shit happens, thats life. I can accept that.

But I absolutely detest it when I am surrounded by people who wants that A at all cost. Its all about the A, its not about doing what we want to, its about doing what is easiest to get that A. Its not learning, its memorising and regurgitating to get that A. There is no meaning in the act, because when I get that A, I can cling on to it and show the world that this justified everything. And when I get that first class honours, I can hang and frame up that certificate and tell the world. "Hey, look at what I've got. Everything I did was for this. All that sacrifices and now I have this certificate."

"Even if you win the rat race, you are still a rat."

It is interesting to note here Jia Jie pointing out that CEOs and the big bosses are not people with great grades. And Jason added that it is all the people with nicely framed 1st class honours certificates who stayed up late and rushed their work. And they will call their boss at 10pm and they will get the reply "can you do it tomorrow?" -slam. I admit, this may not be the case in every single company. But I will place my money on the fact that people up there are not those who furiously copy notes and spend 10 hours doing a lap report for 2 points of their final grades. They are people who have that something else. Networking skills? Flair? All I can say is, they are not people with those dead zombie eyes.

I cannot do that. I cannot tell myself "I am going to sacrifice this time now to get a good degree and start doing what I really want to do after that." Because it will just go on and on, and I will hold my dreams back to save up for a house, a car, and to watch the kids grow up and then I will be dead. I will be dead before even living.

I always look forward to trainings. Because there is when I am with people who train for a cause. We all have our own goals and own reason for donning the tri-suit, tuning the bike, hitting the pool and pounding the pavements. My reason is simply because doing it is makes me feel alive. It is something I find meaning in. Christians go to church, Buddhists pray in temples and I swim-run-bike. Its just that.

Jia Jie, Jason and myself. As Jason said, we will all probably be better off overseas. Where there is more emphasis on sports and people spend their 21 smoking majiana and pot while writing their assignments and drawing smiley faces on their exam papers. Ok, thats not something I will do, but such a concept is just totally unheard off in Singapore.

I want to live the life the way I choose. Here we are, in the middle of the pack. I am imagining being among a huge crowd and we are going to start a marathon. I am rubbing shoulders with those beside me. The horn sounds and people move forward. What can I do?

I am pushed along forward, after a while i start jogging, not knowing why. You know, the whole world can be doing something and they can be wrong. And the hardest thing to do is to believe in oneself have faith in our own action.

"What will you do when the race is run? Turn your golden faces into the sun?"

The greatest thing I discovered today is that I have two more comrades fighting by my side. We fight for what we believe in, or at least we try very hard to. Namaste my friends.

At the end of the day, there will be no cheers, no celebration, no fireworks. The world will carry on and everyone will run by. I will stand on the empty road and watch the sunset. Should I run or should I not. As long as I am choosing the life I choose, it doesn't really matter. The sunset is beautiful, enjoy. There is no victory dance, no one to pat me on the back, no one to say you did the right thing. No one, except my truest friends, will smile in affirmation of that choice.

After writing this, I seached online for that scene after Harold Abraham won the 100m sprint in the 1924 olympics. But I could not find it. From memory, it showed him sitting in the bar with his coach Sam Mussabini. And Sam Mussabine said something like "Today, you and I have achieved something great, but everyone just goes about their damn lives. For us, today is our night! Your and mine!"

The last thing I want to write about is what Jason mentioned happened at the Kona 2008 Ironman. Chrissie Wellington was leading in the cycling leg when she had a flat. Her attempts to fix it failed. Rebekah Keat cycled by and gave her a CO2 cartridge. At that point, she must have did it knowing that she was giving away her gold medal.

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Cheerios
Nicolas

Thanks Nicolas for these short yet powerful words. Time to stop existing and start living.

Moving on

I did it once but I couldn't find the strength and self-determination to see it through. The whole experience has been a myriad of conflicting emotions for me... one filled with its fair share of highs and lows. It wasn't the good feelings or the bad experiences which got to me but ironically the lack of any feeling or attachment at all and the occasional profound discomfort I felt at times which finally got to me. I am not going to put all my money on it being permanent but one thing I can and will say for sure... somethings will change. Perhaps its the familiarity of it all which still holds me back but as the saying goes, "time will erode even the strongest of feelings". Not being the most emotionally charged or sentimental of human beings will certainly make this a lot less trickier but most definitely not any easier. It could be that I am not what I made myself out to be all this time, or it could be just that I lacked the strength in pursuing what I really am. You decide.

Hope

Watching David Cook become the new American Idol certainly made me think twice about my own future to come. David Cook, a bartender from Kansas City (I think), rose from total obscurity to superstardom in a matter of a couple of months. Six months is all it took for Mr Cook to put himself on top of the world, a place he'd never imagined he'd be anywhere near in his lifetime. I don't know where I'll be in three months time let alone 6 months. As mentioned before in an earlier post, I have some dreams I'd like to fulfill before my 21st year draws to a close next year. I don't really need superstardom, but the perseverance, peace of mind and focus to get those goals.  

"At the end of the day, the show is about finding a star. In my opinion, David, you came out here tonight to win, and what we have witnessed is a knockout." 

- Simon Cowell to David Archuleta upon the conclusion of his last song. 

I need to do to my life what young Archuleta did to his song. And my journey begins today. Congrats Mr Cook on a race well done :)