Courtesy.

Bringing a baby no more than 4 years old out for a 9.45 pm movie doesn't say much about your parenting skills. Letting the baby scream his head off in the cinema for a good 5 minutes doesn't say much about your civic mindedness. Screaming back at the many voices hollering for you to take the baby out of the cinema simply shows how stubborn you are. At least you lot have the brains to leave the cinema as soon as the credits started rolling...

Family Round 2

I hope this message reaches you. The invitation was a courtesy call. Its for us to invite and for you to decline. There's no need to get all bitchy and sensitive over the invite. Besides the invite was between my mother and her sibling. It most definitely wasn't extended to you two sad retards exclusively.

I've always practice restraint in dealing with sensitive issues as such but this time round I am going to make an exception. The invitation was from my parents to your parents. If we had a say about it, I wouldn't even let you near the spot where my dog defecates and pisses. Being associated with you (and your siblings) disgusts me. Your crassness and lack of humility is absolutely disgusting. I have always believed in some form in civility when dealing when family issues, since the lot of you can't seem to control your mouths and actions. The internet is a free place. That doesn't mean you don't practice any self restraint.

So watch what you write on the internet my little potty mouth relative. The walls have ears and the hedges have eyes, don't say you haven't been warned.

PS: If you're going to comment, do it in Chinese you uneducated prick since I can barely decipher whatever it is you type in English.

Obnoxious People

People who cannot stop showing off EVEN on Facebook. Yes we know you're a rich, self made gay man but seriously... why the snide comments about someone shopping in Giordano? Geez. If only Facebook had a SLAP HIM function. What an obnoxious prick. I bet modesty isn't registered as a word in his dictionary.

Ranting is fun. I am going to do more of it.

PS: It seems Zoukout didn't turn out to be that fun after all... judging from the tweets and online comments on Facebook. Haha. Told you so.

Moving on to more pressing concerns

Now that we've got the damn World Cup out of the way, I believe that some some semblance of normalcy can be returned to our daily routine and attention be paid to more pertinent issues at hand. I am now one week into my annual ICT and am thoroughly enjoying it. I had the fortune of returning the Bedok camp with a course mate and meeting some really cool people in camp. As I laze about in the morning waiting for the day to start (Life in the FCCs is somewhat different...), I had the chance to sit back and ponder over a couple of issues that have been bugging me over the past week. In no particular order, the list is as follows:

• The standard of the Straits Times
• The plight of Mr Ang Jun Heng Jarius
• The accuracy of Paul the mollusk
• The severe insecurity/superiority complexes of certain individuals in my life
• The lack of good shopping venues in our little island
• NUS (almost everything about this damn institution irks me...)
• And this just in 2 minutes ago... people who don't know when to shut up...

As much as I am really peeved about a number of the issues I brought up earlier, I really don't think I can be bothered to "stand up and make that change" or at least rectify them. Blame it on the apathetic, "I-am-just-going-to-mind-my-own-business" or the hectic schedule of everyday life in Singapore, I am simply don't think I want to be bothered with these little inconveniences in my life. Lest 1.

It was reported in today's papers that the only local victim in the slash-and-rob spree 6 weeks ago has just been discharged from the hospital. The victim, 19 year old Jarius Ang, was set upon by a bunch of thoughtless, merciless thugs on his way home from the MRT station. Hacking wildly at the poor lad, the bunch of robbers were relentless in their assault. I will not elaborate too much on the incident here as most of you would probably have read it (go read it if you haven't... its probably the only story worth following in today's newspaper anyway...). Jarius was left with severe slash wounds to his neck arms and hands whilst the 7 murderous bastards got away (then...) with a hundred over dollars and his freaking mobile phone.

The deed is already done and there's nothing anyone can do to give Mr Ang back the full use of his hand or remove the emotional scarring that his family and him have gone through. It is at times like these when I wished we lived in a world where the saying "what you do unto others will be in turn be done unto you" holds true. Unfortunately, you and I both know that just is just wishful thinking. I sincerely hope that these 7 individuals be persecuted to the fullest extent of the law... OUR laws. Hang 2 of them on charges of 1st degree murder and lock up the rest for manslaughter. No appeals should be considered, no deals made and most definitely no sympathy be shown... they showed none too as they hacked their 5 innocent victims that fateful night.

To Jarius, what you went through that fateful night, I can only imagine just how damn scary it must have been. I hope you come out of this stronger then ever before and seek comfort in the fact that there are many around who feel for you and fume at the senseless attack on you and the other victims. Stay strong and hold the course... there's a light at the end of every tunnel and I am almost certain that that light for you will come sooner than you think :)

PS: To NParks, MOE or whoever owns that stretch of pathway between the station and the residential area... I think its high time you start erecting some MORE lampposts.

Choices

I am not letting this one go. If being a friend means I have to deal with all your insensitiveness and trash talking, I'd rather do without it. And for those who still think I am worth keeping around, don't even joke or make snide remarks if you don't know your OR my limits for that matter.

Opinions.

It always begins as a joke. One person says something stupid, another laughs and he starts saying somethings stupid and the whole thing just perpetuates on and on and on. Just because I laugh along doesn't mean I am fine with being the butt of all your flying jokes all the time. Aside from training with some of you, I don't even know shit about most of you. So let's get this straightened out once and for all. I mentioned this once to someone on the team.Obviously the message didn't get passed around.

"Know your fighting limits"

PS: Mum doesn't approve of my choice of language here. And for those who need a further explanation: Here, in this case, is defined as this particular blog entry. Hence the replacement words.

Project Work

Now that the final product has been submitted, I think I can finally heave a small sigh of relief before continuing on the rest of my modules. I think its more or less confirmed that I'll be using another S/U this semester. GEM 2000. What was potentially an exciting module turned out to be the biggest joke of my university academic career thus far. Blame it on the chemistry between the student and the lecturer, the learner and the module... whatever... to quote Megna who quoted "Gone with the Wind"... Frankly (insert name of lecturer), I don't give a damn.

I regret my lackluster attitude towards my project work and the heart/headache I might have caused them along the way. They were a remarkable bunch... especially G, who took it upon herself to tidy up and see the project all through to the end. Impressive indeed :) If only I didn't loose faith in the whole lesson so early in the semester.

Its highly unlike me to dislike something so... impersonal as a university module so much... but I have to mention just how uninteresting and confusing my GEM 2000 has been so far. There is no doubt that the lecturer knows his stuff and is a highly regarded academic in his line of work... but the delivery of the lesson and the lecturer... the ridiculous emphasis on the formalities in class... frustrates me.

I decided that I am going to S/U this module... It doesn't matter if I fail the module and all. I just regret having signed up for it at all. I should probably consider Marcus's module next year on zoology... sounds like my cup of tea anyway.

Last minute sentiments

I think that Singapore Idol should get themselves some new hosts. Gurmit Singh, in my humble opinion, cheapens the whole presentation of the show. The stuff which made him popular a couple of years ago, isn't working for him now. Hardy Mirza... I sometimes wonder is he the second host OR the secondary host OR the backup host... Absolutely no constructive input from him whatsoever. I just feel that the show deserves better and the hosts are crucial in setting the tone and direction the show takes. The way Gurmit conducted himself during the Michael learns to Rock showcase was just awful. Does anyone honestly care about the fact that they were on your show when they were here the last time they visited Singapore? The band didn't look too excited and he made us, Singaporeans, look so hard-up for once-upon-a-time-boybands... Geez...

"Know thy enemy, know thyself. A thousand battles, a thousand victories."

I play nice most of the time. I would like to think of myself as almost amicable 95 percent of the time and a merry, happy-go-lucky chump who's only worry in the world is whether the Yamato Shrimp in his tank is going to go bonkers and jump into the filter when he goes to bed. That's me till I get pissed off. Now... one might wonder just what it takes to piss me off. My hall administration office waltzed into my friend's room and threw away S$1,600 worth of my items whilst I was holidaying away in Europe and I barely raised my voice. Well, the fact that the personal manning that particular office were working adults who have served the hall for the better part of their lives might have affected the way I reacted but still... a commendable amount of self restraint on my part one must say.

What really pisses me off is the total disregard certain individuals have for their team members. A sports director who is biased, full of hot air and pretends he doesn't know you exist or help with a favour despite always being the first on the list to pass on the good news; A sports secretariat who's incompetance in running and organizing an event resulted not only in the lost what could have been a potientially good race experience but the respect his team-mates had for him; A sports captain who not only doesn't perform his responsibilites at an acceptable level but shys away like a coward when his team mates most need his help...

Whatever I said this morning, I meant it. To you and to anyone who bothered to listen in on what I said. I absolutely hate it when I get taken for a ride and have my carefully laid out plans ruined. I hate it even more that when I asked for help, NO one bothered to come forward and no one bothered to help me explain to the organizers my predicament.

These are the little lessons in life that I'd gladly learn. Lessons that I'd gladly learn so I can better handle individuals like you in the near future.

Fizzling out.

I ran about 1.5 km to the pool... warmed up for about 400m proceeded with a 2 km fast swim... stretched... intended to continue for a 10 km paced run... but... I just shut down... after starting out for about 1.5 km... I just stoned at the bus stop... wondering what the heck I was doing as I stared up and down the lonely road. I was dizzy and kinda pissed about the whole situation. My body hasn't been feeling right these few days... and I just can't seem to eat anything. And I ramble a lot when I don't feel too right. 

I am going to head out for dinner but I am going to come back and finish that darn run before the night is over. 

Gone to Waste

The problem with plans is that they're often subjected to a large number of variables. Some of these variables include bad luck, punctuality problems and random last minute changes. Thats the bloody problem with plans. They NEVER ever go as intended. Ever.

2 Cents

I believe that the S$6,110 dollars I paid for school was to listen to what the one with the qualification has to say; and not your opinion on whether the air-conditioning in the LT was working a not. 

The Picture

At first glance, it did not seem like much. It wasn't exactly the first time I had seen the damn photo. The photograph regardless of it being shot in 1995, 1998, 2005, 2006 or now, 2009 looked exactly the same. The ridiculous grin, the imposing backdrop and immaculately starched shirts... serve nothing but to remind me of what could have been... what should have been. Time, contrary to popular belief, doesn't heal wounds, it merely prolongs the pain and scars of what should not have been. 

I picked up the photograph and glanced at the joyous yet altogether depressing shot before me. I stare intently into the picture hoping to convince myself that I have managed to put it all behind. I couldn't. The words uttered that night by the pool, the fleeting memory of the instant where I realized that it was not to be, the very first time I walked into the compound where I never thought I would be in... it all comes rushing back in a myriad of emotions. Rage, fear, sadness, a warped sense of injustice and most notably, an unparalleled sense of failure... The picture, or what it had been a mere seconds ago, now lay crushed, torn and shredded on the bathroom floor in the exact same manner my dreams did that fateful day. 

I don't think I am over it. I don't think I ever will get over it. A source of strength or perpetual heartache? What it will or might be in the future, no one will know, not even I. Its impacts however are already being felt in the most subtlest of ways. The fear of taking responsibility, the disdain for authoritative figures, the immense hatred for those who wield their privileges without regard for others... all it took was an ill placed comment and a picture. A god-damn picture. Its not over yet; not now, not ever. 

Temper

Everyone has a temper; an upper-limit; a breaking point or whatever you wanna call it. I just reached mine. 

Unfounded Fears

I always believe that it is only oneself that can truly find his/her own happiness. I believe that if you want something and know the full consequences of getting it, then go get it. Sitting around, rationalizing, thinking about it and blaming the whole damn world around you for your absolute lack of action isn't going to aid in any way whatsoever. Worrying about ever single damn opinion isn't going to bring you any closer to your goal. Ultimately you just become pushy and the whole thing becomes a mere obsession which you secretly not want to get away from. Nobody really cares if you'd ask me. Just you.