Reflections

Its Friday all over again and the 4th day since I ended my internship. Life's been pretty good so far to me and I really do cherish the absence of datelines and the rush of the day to day life of a corporate intern. I have done a lot of thinking and I am glad that I have finally thought through some of the worries I have had over the past few months. It seems that with greater freedom comes a slightly better peace of mind, and with that a certain improvement in the fog of life which surrounds us as we bustle about everyday. Some people have mentioned to me previously that it was the absence of faith which has resulted in the path I am on today, others blame it on the distractions the last two years has brought me. I spent the last three years looking for the answer and all too suddenly it came to me as I was listening to "Smoky Mountain Memories" and sipping tea yesterday afternoon.

I believe that acknowledgement of one's mistakes and recognizing and accepting it is the first step to redemption. Loosing the captainship of my JC's sailing team 4 years ago marked the start of the long spiraling journey down. One thing let to another and all too soon I lost myself in that downward spiral in the sea of self-pity and self-loathe. It started to eat into me and I began to loose focus on the things that really mattered. My A' level grades was just one of the many things I ruined along the long way down. The journey to the bottom is long but the speed at which one travels down surely ensures that the journey doesn't take too long. Many people don't realize that they're rolling down till they hear the crashing sound when they hit the bottom. I was lucky. The path I took wasn't exactly a smooth slope and there were numerous obstacles on my way down, called friends and family. :) And through them, I realized the path I was taking and snapped out of it before I dropped further. 

I have done a great many things I regret deeply but I guess as someone once said, "Its all part of my learning journey". Things are looking better now in so many ways and I am glad I found that ray of light at the end of the long dark tunnel.