Sunset

She was strict. I didn't like her much when I first met her. She gave tons of homework, pulled my already deformed right ear and rapped my knuckles when I didn't get the homework done. However, its only fair that I state that I wasn't an easy student either. Locking her out of my house. Check. Locking her in the balcony. Check. Throwing an item at her (Orange, Glass mug, Telephone... etc.). Check. I wasn't easy and I can say for certain that I most definitely gave her a run for her money. The journey was long and arduous but it finally paid off with me getting an A* for my PSLE Chinese. The only A I would ever get for a Chinese paper. Ever. She bought me a really cool stationary set and a set of stickers for that A*, a testament to my hard work (Thank you...) and more importantly her success at taming and grooming me to succeed and like the Chinese Language. 

The message came at a most awkward time. My family members had just finished a rather delightful dinner when my cousin got the message. I am not at liberty to disclose the details but it was rather unsettling. Nothing was confirmed and we all just hoped and prayed that it would all be a bad scare. 

I had just finished a rather eventful ride with my mates and was having dinner with my dad when the call came. There wasn't much melodrama or anything, just a sad resignation acknowledging the harsh realities of life. I threw on a shirt and a pair of jeans and my sis, dad and I were out of the house in the blink of an eye. 

She looked at me with her great big eyes and a grin on her face. She was in immense discomfort, no doubt about it, but looking at her, one could hardly tell. She was thin yet so full of joy as she shook our hands and whispered hi. I smiled and we talked about stuff. Its hard to summarize 10 years in 5 minutes but we did it. I grasped her hand and she held on to mine. Thats all it took. We chatted and laughed. She couldn't speak well yet she was still full of advice. "Study hard", "Don't get attached so young". It wasn't easy for her and it sure as hell wasn't easy for me nor for anyone who knew her. Her husband gently moved to her side, a gentle reminder to us that she needed rest. She held my hand and told me not to go back if there wasn't anything serious. Even under such dire predicaments, it was still others before herself. 

My mum asked why I was so quiet on the ride back. I told her I was tired from the bike ride. I lied. I have not cried for the longest time ever and tonight the tears just couldn't stop. Memories of her. Thoughts on Life. Anger at how unfair it all can be. There wasn't a particular reason why I did what I did I guess. 

I told a friend once, or maybe more than once,  "Life's too short to sweat the small stuff". I guess I never realized the true implications of that statement till today. I hope you'll recover. Thanks for the memories and most importantly, thanks for educating me and not giving up on me. Thank you so much.